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Should I Move When My Spouse is Deployed?

by Ally Abernathy | Dec 10, 2024 | Veteran Life

Should I Move When My Spouse is Deployed

When your spouse is deployed, life at home can feel different and challenging. One major decision many military spouses face is whether to move during the deployment or stay put.

While moving can provide new opportunities or bring you closer to family, it also comes with its own set of challenges.

Understanding the factors involved can help you make the best decision for you and your family.

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In this Article

  • Understanding the Emotional Impact of Deployment
  • Key Factors to Consider When Deciding to Move
  • Financial Implications of Moving
  • Advantages of Moving During Deployment
  • Challenges of Moving During Deployment
  • Should You Stay Instead?
  • Essential Resources for Military Families During Deployment
  • Making the Decision: Questions to Ask Yourself
  • Expert Tips for Navigating a Move During Deployment
  • FAQs About Moving During Deployment

Understanding the Emotional Impact of Deployment

Deployment can be emotionally draining, both for the deployed spouse and those left behind. Deciding whether to move adds another layer to this experience.

“Deployment is an adjustment for everyone involved, and your living environment plays a big role in how you cope,” says Sarah Wilson, a licensed counselor specializing in military families.

For some, moving closer to family or a support network helps alleviate feelings of isolation. For others, staying in a familiar setting provides comfort and stability.


Key Factors to Consider When Deciding to Move

Before making a decision, take the following into account:

1. Support System

  • Do you have friends or family nearby who can offer support if you stay?
  • Would moving bring you closer to people who can help with emotional and practical needs?

2. Financial Implications

  • Moving can be costly, even with military allowances.
  • Consider whether relocation will save or increase your expenses.

3. Children’s Needs

  • How will moving affect your children’s education, friendships, and routines?
  • Will staying or moving offer better stability during this time?

4. Employment

  • If you’re employed, can you continue working if you move?
  • Will moving improve or limit your job opportunities?

5. Housing Situation

  • Are you currently living in on-base housing or renting off-base?
  • Moving may involve breaking a lease or finding a new home, which can be a logistical challenge.

Financial Implications of Moving

Relocating during deployment comes with costs, and it’s essential to understand your options and available assistance.

ExpenseAverage CostDetails
Moving Services$1,000 – $5,000Costs vary by distance and size of the move.
Lease TerminationUp to 2 months’ rentSome leases allow early termination for PCS.
Temporary Housing$800 – $2,000/monthMay be needed if you’re waiting for a new home.

The military may provide financial assistance, including allowances for Permanent Change of Station (PCS) moves. However, voluntary moves for personal reasons may not qualify for reimbursement.

“Understanding your financial situation and resources is critical when making the decision to move,” explains Mark Roberts, a financial consultant who works with military families.


Advantages of Moving During Deployment

Moving during deployment offers several potential benefits:

Proximity to Family and Support:
Relocating closer to family can provide emotional support, childcare assistance, and companionship during a difficult time.

Financial Savings:
If you’re paying high rent, moving to a more affordable area could reduce expenses.

Improved Environment:
A new location might offer better schools, job opportunities, or a safer community.


Challenges of Moving During Deployment

While moving has its advantages, it’s not without its drawbacks:

Disruption to Routine:
Packing, relocating, and adjusting to a new place can be overwhelming.

Limited PCS Entitlements:
Voluntary moves may not be covered under PCS allowances, leaving you responsible for all costs.

Children’s Adjustment:
Relocating can disrupt their education, friendships, and overall sense of stability.

Logistical Burden:
Handling a move alone while your spouse is deployed adds extra stress.


Should You Stay Instead?

Staying in your current home has its own set of benefits:

  • Familiarity and Stability: Staying put maintains a consistent environment for you and your children.
  • Easier Communication: Staying near a military base may offer better access to family readiness groups or other support systems.
  • Avoid Moving Costs: Remaining in your current home eliminates relocation expenses.

Essential Resources for Military Families During Deployment

Navigating life during deployment can be challenging, but a variety of programs and resources are available to help military families. These organizations offer support ranging from financial assistance and childcare to relocation planning and emotional well-being. Whether you’re considering a move or simply need extra help managing day-to-day responsibilities, these trusted resources provide practical solutions and a sense of community. Explore the options below to find what works best for you.


Military OneSource
Military OneSource offers a range of free services to help military families during deployment. From relocation assistance to financial counseling and emotional support, this program connects families with the resources they need to navigate the challenges of deployment and moving. It also provides access to specialized tools like moving checklists and support hotlines for immediate assistance. Learn more at Military OneSource.

  • Free counseling services for military families.
  • Access to relocation planning tools and resources.
  • 24/7 support through a confidential hotline.

Family Readiness Groups (FRG)
Family Readiness Groups are local support networks created for military spouses and families. These groups help families stay informed about deployment-related updates and provide a sense of community through events and activities. FRGs are great for building friendships and gaining access to vital information and resources during challenging times. Learn more at Family Readiness Groups.

  • Regular updates on deployment and unit activities.
  • Social events and activities to build community.
  • Localized support tailored to your base and unit.

Armed Services YMCA (ASYMCA)
The Armed Services YMCA (ASYMCA) provides programs and services designed to support military families. These include affordable childcare, emergency assistance, and recreational activities like summer camps for children of deployed service members. ASYMCA focuses on reducing the burdens faced by military families through practical, accessible programs. Learn more at ASYMCA.

  • Affordable childcare services for military families.
  • Summer camps and youth programs for children.
  • Emergency assistance for unexpected financial challenges.

National Military Family Association (NMFA)
The NMFA supports military spouses and families by offering resources like educational scholarships, wellness programs, and deployment support. They advocate for military families, ensuring they have access to the tools and benefits they need. Their scholarships help spouses advance their education or career during deployment. Learn more at NMFA.

  • Scholarships for military spouses seeking education or training.
  • Wellness retreats and support programs.
  • Advocacy for improved military family benefits.

Operation Homefront
Operation Homefront provides financial assistance and support services for military families. Their programs include transitional housing for families facing financial hardship and seasonal initiatives like the “Back-to-School Brigade” and “Holiday Meals for Military.” These efforts help families manage both long-term and immediate challenges. Learn more at Operation Homefront.

  • Transitional housing for military families in need.
  • School supply drives and holiday meal programs.
  • Financial assistance for emergency situations.

Plan My Move
Plan My Move is an official DoD tool that simplifies the relocation process for military families. It offers customizable checklists, budgeting tools, and step-by-step guidance to help families manage their move efficiently. Whether it’s a Permanent Change of Station (PCS) or a personal relocation, this tool is invaluable for planning and organization. Learn more at Plan My Move.

  • Customizable moving checklists tailored to your needs.
  • Budgeting tools for managing relocation expenses.
  • Step-by-step relocation guides for military families.

Child Care Aware of America (CCAoA)
Child Care Aware of America provides subsidized childcare services for military families. Their programs make quality childcare affordable and accessible, especially for families with a deployed service member. CCAoA also offers resources to help parents find trusted care providers in their area. Learn more at Child Care Aware of America.

  • Reduced-cost childcare for military families.
  • Access to vetted childcare providers near your location.
  • Resources for navigating childcare options during deployment.

Housing Assistance Programs
Military families can access housing assistance through their base’s housing office or programs like the Servicemembers Civil Relief Act (SCRA). These services guide families in finding suitable housing, breaking leases during deployment, or managing property-related issues. Learn more at Military Housing Assistance.

  • Help with on-base or off-base housing options.
  • Guidance on lease termination under the SCRA.
  • Assistance with property-related concerns during deployment.

Making the Decision: Questions to Ask Yourself

Use the following questions to evaluate your options:

  • Will moving improve my emotional well-being?
  • Can I afford the costs associated with relocating?
  • How will moving affect my children’s education and social life?
  • Do I have enough support where I currently live?

By addressing these questions, you’ll have a clearer picture of whether moving aligns with your personal and family goals.


Expert Tips for Navigating a Move During Deployment

If you decide to move, consider these tips to make the process smoother:

  • Plan Ahead: Start early and create a checklist of tasks, including finding housing, transferring schools, and setting up utilities.
  • Use Military Resources: Reach out to your base’s relocation office for advice and assistance.
  • Communicate with Your Spouse: Keep them informed about your plans and progress, even if they’re far away.
  • Stay Organized: Use apps or spreadsheets to track important documents, expenses, and deadlines.

“The key to a successful move during deployment is preparation and leaning on the support networks available to you,” suggests Carla Jenkins, a military relocation specialist.


FAQs About Moving During Deployment

Is it better to move closer to family during deployment?
Moving closer to family can provide emotional support and practical help, but it depends on your specific situation. Evaluate the benefits and challenges of relocating.

Does the military pay for moves during deployment?
The military covers costs for Permanent Change of Station (PCS) moves but may not cover voluntary relocations. Check with your base for guidance.

How can I support my children if we move during deployment?
Focus on maintaining routines, enrolling them in a good school, and encouraging new friendships. Prepare them by discussing the move early.

What are the biggest challenges of moving during deployment?
The biggest challenges include logistical stress, adjusting to a new environment, and potential financial costs, especially for voluntary moves.

Are there resources to help with relocation during deployment?
Yes, resources like Military OneSource, Family Readiness Groups, and base relocation offices offer assistance for military families.

Can I stay in base housing if my spouse is deployed?
Yes, you can usually remain in base housing during deployment, but check with your housing office for specific policies.

How do I decide whether to move during deployment?
Consider factors like financial impact, emotional support, children’s needs, and your housing situation before making a decision.

Can I break a lease to move during deployment?
Some leases allow early termination for military families under the Servicemembers Civil Relief Act (SCRA). Check your lease agreement and consult with legal services.

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